Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Keepen Hope Alive

I try with all of my heart to belive that god has a plan for me , and that is why i must suffer but lately i find myself thinking that my life is more of a pain filled hell . I just can't understand why i have to suffer so much , what i have i done worng that god is maken me live a life of pain.My doctor's don't know what to give me to take the pain away, they don't know why i am haven chest pains , or why i am haven these headachs that have been going on now for 2 1/2 months . I am just finding it very hard to cope with everthing that i have to handle . I mean i am to young for all of these things to be holding me back . I was told that by the age of 23 i would be in a wheel chair full time . That has not happened but i am in one alot of the time and i have to use my cane and a walker but alot has to do with the pain . I just can't see the light at the end of the tunnal and i am running out of hope .But i know i can't let this illness take over and i know i can't give up but you have no clue how many times i have wanted too. I can't let this win i just hope i am storng enough to hold on to HOPE ..

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